happier but afraid

i live my life offline

when we r happy, we write little.

when we r sad, we write a lot.

when i write this, am i happy or sad?

hahaha…

you said i was stupid to do it, yea i agree. but i guess i trust you so much that you will be the only one i told. or maybe i shouldnt even have told you in the first place.

oh well……..

when walking to the bus stop, being a little high, i had such a great urge to just msg you something stupid. at least i stopped myself.

learning self-control now. on my temper, on my diet, on the alcohol….

now just TGIF and JB on saturday!!! (: (:

really just starting to enjoy taking it easy and just meeting friends to chill and catch up.

i dont ask for more.

it isn’t that easy to hide your emotions from others, but it is not impossible. over the past 1 month, busy preparing for exams, going through so much different emotions. i cant count the number of times i cried or just felt so happy next to you. the extremes of emotions just left both of us so drained.

you used to tell me how love would conquer everything. i always told you otherwise.

i watched countless of movies on the way back from london. i just couldnt sleep. out of all the random shows i watched and krisflyer dying on me twice, ‘he’s just not into you’, ‘handsome suit’ and ‘40 yr-old virgin’ taught me different lessons on love. just when you thought nothing good will come out from lame rom comedies.

i never thought i could care that much about a person. i never thought there wld be someone willing to care so much about me. i never thought that what could seem to be possibly a mistake right from the start to turn out to be something so good. but we were both wrong in some ways, that we ended up like this.

no matter what, thank you. i really miss you but you know what is holding me back.

why am i writing all these out? i want to have the guts to write down my emotions, face them and be open about them. this is something that has never been easy for me. but i would try, for the sake of myself and all the people ard me who cares about me.

and now, i should just sleep and have the courage to face a new day with hope. being truthful to yourself, to me, is the thing i really want to do now.

swing joy swing!

single and swinging NOT.

damn.

but a hot hot singapore as usual!

clearing up misconceptions can be a bitch.

should i care? just like how you may change the topic once, you cant do that forever.

or maybe you can.

today’s weather looks good.

a perfectly good caramel latte gone to waste.

a once perfectly good relationship is gone.

what else can i say?